The Best Gift to Give Ourselves: Being Inherently Flawed
“Our flaws are what makes us human. If we can accept them as part of who we are, they really don't even have to be an issue.” - Ellen DeGeneres
We always expect that our lives are going to be infused with so much joy and happiness around this time of year…but then things go awry:
Weather interferes with intricate travel plans…
The obligatory holiday party is the loneliest place in the world…
The perfect gift’s delivery went MIA and customer service…can’t provide service…
That person, who’s a bit intimidating, is beelining it in our direction…
And then:
…tempers turn-up, disappointment descends, and the stress to “fix it” becomes overwhelming.
…we overshoot the mark in proactively calming our social anxiety.
…we take our sadness and frustration out on someone who’s just doing their job.
… a neuron misfires and something is said that came out totally wrong.
We tend to label the aftermath of how we reacted in certain situations with shame, regret, remorse, and even despair.
But our humanity is that we are tumbleweeds of thoughts, feelings, and emotions, swirling around, occasionally colliding into each other. We errr!
When we can fully embrace that this an inevitable part of our existence (like farting), we can let it happen, allow it to move through us, and let it go. Having this perspective can even help us to forgive others when we are on the receiving end of something that has gone afoul.
Even the little blunders sometimes contribute to a bigger narrative as small pieces of evidence for when we say things about ourselves like:
I’m so stupid.
I never get it right.
I’m hopeless.
The best present that we can give to ourselves is to not prosecute an innocent human who’s at the unexplainable mercy of this phenomenon of err’ing!
So during this holiday season when there is extra chaos and pressure to be in these idyllic environments, remember that these imperfect behaviors is the one guaranteed commonality that every human being has and will encounter.
Let yourself slip up and laugh it off as this bizarre quality that artificial intelligence will never be able to mimic!
Happy Holidays Everyone!!!
And if you’re also facing gathering with difficult people, check out this blog post “Loving the Unconscious” to ground your sanity before you go..